Learning through Observation.

I remembered when I was young. I did not go to any kindergarten or any preschool. Those days, I spent most of my time with my mother. Either at home or following her around.

My mother woke up early in the morning. As early as 4.30 am. She started her morning boiling water and cook breakfast. Our breakfast those days was different. I still smell the rice cooked on the hot stove. Stove that used cut woods, burnt and give heat to the food.

It was nice to smell the salted fish which my mother normally fry, added with some chopped chillies. Most of the mornings, rice was eaten either with fried salted fish with chillies or stir fried tapioca also with chillies.

By 5.30 am, food were packed ready for my father who normally need to leave home to work. He cycle everyday, almost 4 miles to his workplace, a palm oil estate. That was also the main reason why my mother always cooked heavy breakfast every morning.

Most of my childhood memories were with my mother, at home and around her daily routine. I hardly hear her complaint about doing the same thing every morning and every day.

There were once, (after I am married) I asked her. “Mom, how could you  be happy that way?”.

She looked at me and said, “Well, because you are there with me. That’s why I did not send you to school.”

I hardly believe about what she said. Until today, I was asking myself. Was that really the reason? I mean for both ; reason for not sending me to school and the reason that made her happy.

Whatever it is, one thing for sure, I learnt a lot through observation, at home.

I observed how:

+ my mother went through her routine without complaining or whining.

+ my mother set her time and routine

+ my mother used everything around home to prepare food on the table without fail.

+ my mother used her skills to create new challenges in life.

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MAK DAN ANAK PEREMPUAN
In the photo: My mother, Me and my 2 elder sisters.

 

Above all, I am now able to recall, how my mother used to ‘schooling’ me without having me to go to school.

I wonder what would the memories that I will have and going to have with my own children?

How about you?
What was the most memorable journey you had with your Mother?

Or perhaps the right question is, what will be the most memorable life experience that you plan to have with your children?

KEPERLUAN PERIBADI dan KEPERLUAN ORANG LAIN

KERJAYA dan TANGGUNGJAWAB

 

Seringkali apa yang kita fikirkan merupakan perkara yang berasaskan ‘ketakutan’ yang tidak pasti. Kebimbangan seperti ini, biasanya menyebabkan kita mudah resah dan terpengaruh kepada nasihat yang salah daripada orang yang tidak betul.

 

APA AKAN JADI SEANDAINYA…

 

Dalam sebuah temubual bisnes yang saya dengar melalui radio, seorang usahawan itu menjawab soalan dengan tenang.

 

Apabila ditanya, “Sekiranya bisnes sekarang ada yang mahu membeli dan Puan menjualnya, apa pula yang Puan akan lakukan?”

 

“Oh, saya ada banyak perkara lain yang boleh dilakukan. Saya percaya, apabila kena dengan harganya, bisnes ini saya boleh jualkan saja. Ada banyak perkara lain yang boleh dilakukan.”

 

Jawapan yang diberikan dengan penuh keyakinan itu, membuatkan saya berfikir berkali-kali.

 

Selama ini, banyak kisah dan cerita yang didengar berlegar kepada pengembangan dan kelangsungan bisnes. Tidak banyak yang bercakap tentang ‘apa akan jadi andai’, dalam konteks bisnes mahupun keadaan sebenar.

 

Apa juga bidang yang kita lakukan, kebimbangan begini memang sering berlaku dan banyak yang tidak mempunyai asas yang kukuh. Kebolehan individu itu, masih banyak yang boleh diteroka untuk membolehkan kita terus berjalan kehadapan meskipun kita perlu menukar kenderaan atau melalui jalan alternatif.

 

KERJAYA

 

Kerjaya sebagai guru tadika misalnya, membolehkan seseorang itu menemui banyak kemahiran lain. Apabila disoal, “ Seandainya Puan diberhentikan kerja, apa yang Puan akan lakukan?” Biasanya, jawapan yang diberi ialah, “Oh, saya masih boleh mencari kerja sebagai guru tadika di syarikat / tempat lain.”

 

Sebagai seorang CEO syarikat misalnya, kemahiran dan jaringan yang dibina biasanya cukup ampuh untuk membolehkan beliau terus meneroka pasaran atau bidang bisnes yang baru atau membina tim baru.

 

Apabila disoal, “Selepas meletakkan jawatan sebagai CEO syarIkat ini, apa yang Tuan akan lakukan?” Tidak pernah saya mendengar daripada mereka yang professional berkata, “Oh, tidak! Saya tetap mahukan jawatan itu!”

 

Perancangan peribadi dan perancangan pengurusan syarikat adalah dua perkara yang berbeza. Kerjaya yang melibatkan keputusan peribadi dan kerjaya yang melibatkan situasi membuat keputusan dalam syarikat bisnes adalah berbeza dari segi kesan dan impaknya.

 

BAKAT

 

Kerjaya peribadi banyak memberikan kesan kepada diri dan keluarga. Manakala keputusan syarikat melibatkan syarikat lain, rakan kongsi, pemegang saham, rakan niaga, pelanggan, pembekal dan mana-mana pihak yang terlibat secra langsung dengan perkembangan bisnes.

 

Kerjaya bukanlah satu-satunya yang ada pada kita. Jawatan dan pangkat hanyalah salah satu cara untuk menyusunkan tugas dan kerja dalam organisasi tertentu.

 

Selebihnya, BAKAT itu adalah sesuatu yang mampu membawakan kebaikan. Menjadikan kita manusia yang lebih bermanfaat serta membawakan kebaikan.

 

KEMAHIRAN, MINAT dan BAKAT

 

Apa yang sering difokuskan ialah kemahiran. Kemahiran juga tidak menjadi soal. Ia boleh dipelajarinya. Sama ada berbakat atau tidak, semua orang boleh mempelajari sebarang kemahiran yang mereka mahu.

 

Perkara yang membezakannya ialah minat dan bakat. Mereka yang mempunyai bakat tertentu akan mudah menguasai kemahiran berbanding dengan mereka yang kurang berbakat. Namun, seandainya tidak minat dalam bidang itu, bakat itu agak sukar untuk diteroka apatah lagi untuk dikemabangkan.

 

MASA DEPAN

 

Anak-anak dan diri kita juga merupakan entiti yang bakal membentuk masa hadapan. Apakah yang bakal berlaku, ia merupakan ketentuan.

 

Perkara utama ialah menyusun rancangan dan pelan serta bertindak, meskipun kita tidak mempunyai sebarang petunjuk akan kejadian masa hadapan.

 

Keperluan peribadi dan keperluan yang melibatkan kumpulan manusia yang lebih besar, memerlukan kita membuat keputusan.

 

Bijaksana dan adil adalah ciri-ciri manusia.

Kita semua, mempunyainya.

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Noraminah Omar

IT IS ABOUT YOU, NOT YOUR GENDER

I remember once when I was talking to a few friends over lunch. One of the girl at the table said, “You know, I am not happy with some interview questions that posted to us ladies who are in business.”

“Oh, what about it?” I asked spontaneously.

“You see, they always thought that those ladies who ventured into business are only ladies with problems.” She continued.

“Really?” another girl at the end of the table suddenly raised her voice. All of us started to give full attention to what our friend going to say next.

“Many shared stories about ladies who are in business, and become successful in what they do because of their bad experience in life. Many were highlighted as widow, divorcee or even those who were cheated or being manipulated in some ways.

They always make stories in such that women were driven into business because of poverty, hatred and anger. I don’t agree to that!”

“I got your point.” I said softly as I continue to drink my orange juice, which tasted just nice. Not to sour, not too thick, not too sweet.

She continued before anyone else could say anything.

“I would rather be supportive to stories that share about women who are successful in business not because of their gender. The stories shared should be highlighted more on how do they do it technically.

What are the best practices that they implement in their current venture, and how do they adapt with changes of the economy and the current social development of the community.

I guess, all of us should crafted better stories ourselves. It should no longer focusing on how bad we were before. Sharing of stories should be made for practical sharing.

It must benefit others as they can copy and made it even better. Then only, we can be truly be part of the business circle, not simply stand and taken as fillers or filling in the quota.”

It was a long ‘speech’ that I ever heard over lunch. I don’t know. In a way, I agreed with what she said. And at the same time, I truly understand that the reality for women out there, are basically tough enough to be heard.

I guess, it is true that woman is like a tea bag. We only know how strong it is, until we put it in hot water.
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min punb trip singapore

LAKUKAN PERKARA BAIK. MESKIPUN TIDAK SUKA.

Saya masih ingat semasa saya kecil. Saya paling benci apabila diminta makan ubat dalam bentuk pil. Sukarnya mahu ditelan, meskipun besar pil itu umpama sebiji kacang dal sahaja.

Saya masih ingat. Ibu saya menyediakan air manis yang sedap agar saya dapat menelan ubat itu. Ibu juga menyediakan buah buahan agar saya mahu makan pil itu. Buah pisang adalah antara yang biasa.

Pernah satu ketika, saya terpaksa membuang pil ubat akibat muntah apabila cuba menelannya.

Suatu hari saya terfikir. Sekiranya saya tidak makan pil itu, bagaimana saya mahu sihat cepat? Sekiranya saya tidak makan pil itu, saya akan jatuh sakit sekali lagi.

Saya mula memikirkan.

  • Pil ini ubat.
  • Ia memberikan kebaikan.
  • Pahit, tetapi saya perlu untuk sihatkan badan.
  • Baik. Makan saja pil ini, seperti saya tertelan gula-gula.
    Lupakan pahit. Ingat yang manis.

Maka, saya mula menelan pil dengan menutup hidung.

Rupa-rupanya, tanpa mengambl kira dan melupakan tentang bau pil, saya dapat membuangkan persepsi ‘pahit’ ubat itu.

Apabila melihat kepada tugasan yang ada pada hari ini, termasuklah menyediakan laporan dan memantau penggunaan SOP, perlu juga tutupkan telinga. Usah ambil kira ‘kata-kata’ dan ‘komen’ yang tidak membawa manfaat.

Ya, buangkan persepsi ‘orang tidak suka’’, ‘susah’, ‘leceh’ dan ‘membuang masa’.
Buat. Sediakan. Kumpulkan input. Follow-up. Baiki. Ikut sahaja tatacara seperti yang dinasihatkan oleh pakar.

Ia leceh. Seperti ubat, yang datang dengan pelbagai bentuk dan cara makan.

Ia memenatkan. Seperti ubat juga, pahit.

Ia tidak seronok. Seperti ubat juga, tidak sedap.

Ia memerlukan komitmen. Seperti ubat, makan mesti mengikut waktu dan amaun atas nasihat doktor.

buku min di rak

Yang pasti, manfaatnya membawakan kebaikan. Untuk melakukan sesuatu perkara baik yang kita tidak suka:
+ Dengar dan ikut kata pakar.

+ Wujudkan persepsi positif dengan menyenaraikan manfaatnya.

+ Fikir dan bayangkan hasil daripada manfaat itu

+ Buat dengan konsisten
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WHEN CHOICES ARE DIFFICULT, DELAY OUR JUDGMENT.

My daily life revolves among my family, friends and the community. Still, what happened in my house is the closest to my memory and heart above all.

I remembered how my daughter was whining about her tuition class. This class specifically arranged by her school for the students to prepare for a special exam taken by all final year students in primary level before entering secondary level. Here, it is called as UPSR.

One night, she was complaining about how the teachers handle the learning session.

”Mom, why do you need to send me for the tuition class?”

I looked at her, still wondering what exactly she wanted to say.

“Why should I go for such additional class?”she broke into tears.

“Well, if you think you want to stop, it is fine. Tell your teacher that tonight is your last class. You don’t have to attend the class.” I simply answer her without looking as I was about to get angry.

As a mother, I made the best effort in any way to help her, including paying extra for additional class. In a way, I felt a bit uneasy and sad with what she said. I was thinking that the class should be able to help her in her study.

 

gambar aanak-anak

 

Later that night, I asked my husband to talk to her, as I know I will not be able to control my anger.

The next day, I saw my husband sitting with her, explaining the basic concept of decimal, and how to use the concept in our daily life, especially when it comes to calculation involving money.

The following day, I asked her again, knowing that I am much better in control of myself.

“So, how was your class?” I asked casually.

“Mom, the teacher in our class showed us a different way to calculate. But, in the tuition class, this teacher shows us something else. I am confused!”

“Then, have you decided about the class?”

She kept quiet, and I continue.

“You see… when the teacher showed us many ways to solve one problem, it means we have more option to choose. That is even better. At the end of the day, they wanted us to find the answer, the solution.

It is still our choice to choose any one of the ways to solve it.

That is something that we need to cherish and be thankful.
There is no need to be stressed out. Take it easy. Choose the best way to get the answer. ”

 

She smiled. I know that she has closed the case of withdrawing herself from the class.

I realized that our life as an adult is not much different from our children. Sometime, when we find many ways to solve one issue, we become even worst. We find it difficult to make decision to choose.

This could lead us to another stressful situation, which unintentionally created by ourselves.

It would be a good idea to take a day or two, and talk to other people to get new insights and ideas. Find out new opinion of others, while keeping our own judgment to ourselves.

When we come into a situation, delaying our judgment is an option.

EAT THAT FROG FIRST!

As parents, we have certain expectation that we set for ourselves and for our children. There are many items in the list, and our job become harder to prioritise. There are items which are urgent and some which are urgent and important.

Well, the number of our children in family matters too.

Still, how normally we set what we need ned to complete and do?

I remember once when I decided to do things which I love most, and left the rest for later. I love to have rest and lay down for few minutes as I reach home everyday. However, I found that it effect my concentration on later work which I quite don’t like.

min selfie froggie 5
So, I made a change in my routine. Instead of completing and doing things that I love the most, I started with things which I don’t like doing.

How about you?
How do you normally handle things around at home?

Will you start doing things that you like and move to the rest later?
Or, you will complete those you don’t like doing first?

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